I know I am horrible at keeping up with my Blog, and I keep telling myself that I will keep up with it, but it just gets lower and lower on my list of things to do, But, I am writing today and giving a small little update on my Transformation progress so far!
As many of you know, I started my Transformation on May 21, 2013. Lets rewind a few days prior to May 21, 2013 and let you inside my head…
I weighed in at 171 pounds, I had depression and anxiety, a lack of self esteem and an over-abundance of Self Hate. I hated looking at myself in the mirror, and would avoid taking pictures at any cost unless I was hiding behind one of my children. I used to give myself the excuse of "Well I have 3 kids, so its okay for me to be fat." I would avoid the mirrors since I hated my appearance so so so much. I went out and bought myself the largest size pants I have ever been in along with the largest size shirt at our local DI.
I remember waking up and the first thing I could think of was "Why couldn't I have taken my last breath before waking up!!!" Yes, I hated myself that much. I literally wanted to DIE. I didn't believe in myself at all, and I didn't love myself at all either.
Thank goodness that I have the most supportive and loving husband I could ever ask for, and I know if it wasn't for him, I probably would not be where I am today.
FAST FORWARD to May 20, 2013…. I received my Package with my Isagenix products in it, (Link Here) and took my "before" photos and weight. The next day I would be starting.
Let me share the before pictures, and please excuse the graphic-ness to the pictures. I never thought I would be sharing them with anybody cuz honestly, I never thought I would make it.
I wish I would have taken the measurements and stepped on the Body Composition Scale that we have in our Team, but I was too chicken to know the results. I wanted to be ignorant because I didn't believe in myself and I didn't believe that I could face reality of what I have done to my body over the last few years.
Week by Week, I would loose 2-3 pounds each time I stepped on the scale on my "Weigh-in-Wednesdays"
I couldn't believe that it was actually working!!!
Not only was I loosing weight extremely easily, but I started to sleep really good, my anxiety was less and less each week, and my depression started to lighten.
I had many many people tell me how sad they feel for me since I care so much about my weight. I had many people tell me what a disgrace I am for working out and leaving my children at home.
Many many people told me that I am such a horrible mother, and shouldn't have the right to have children.
Many people told me I couldn't make it, and I was stupid to think that I could.
Many people Laughed at me and called me names.
Sometimes I doubted myself along the first few months, but then I snapped out of it and realized I was doing what they can't.
I was taking control. I was being my own person and I was no longer going to let other people tell me how I need to feel, Look and think about myself… cuz a lot of good that has done for me in the past.
On September 15, 2013, I hit my goal weight of 120 pounds. ( I actually weighed in at 118)
My shorts, as you can see, don't even fit me anymore!
Back in may, I could BARELY pull these up on my thighs!!! I looked like a busted can of biscuits in these shorts.
I lost 53 pounds in 4 months.
53 pounds.
Thats as much as my two girls combined.
53 pounds.
I never thought that I could do something like that.
I LOVED looking in the mirror and taking pictures of myself. I loved being able to actually throw all my fat jeans away. Going through your closet of clothes and trying on everything and throwing 3/4 of it all in the trash was so so so exciting!! It was like a ritual for me; a spiritual ritual. I sent all my bad energy back to where it came from, and put it out of my head (and my house for good.)
From September to November, I maintained my weight Beautifully and Easily with the help of Isagenix.
In the last days of November, my Sister in law dragged me to a little place called "2xtreme Bootcamp" (Link Here) for some fitness classes.
That is where I was truly born.
Getting my Booty kicked by a retired Military Man Seriously rocked. One workout with him, and I was HOOKED!!!
I signed up for Personal Training with him 3 times a week on December 4, 2013 along with attending Bootcamp 3 times a week.
I workout 6 times a week for an Hour each time.
Within 3 weeks, I started Seeing Ab Progression. WHAT??? ABS??? yes, Abs.
I have 3 kids, and I also have Abs. (Well, starting to have them anyways)
I stuck with Training and I stuck with Isagenix, and In January 2014, my progress has been Phenomenal…
I Cannot Believe that it has almost been a year since I started my Journey.
I cannot believe that I used to think of myself in such a disgusting way.
I cannot believe how far I have come.
I have taken control of my life, my weight, my thoughts and I have turned everything into a positive thing.
My children will not grow up with a mother who hates her appearance.
My kids will not grow up with a mother with self hate.
My kids will not grow up hearing negative things coming out of their mother mouth about herself.
I refuse to let what I went though to happen to my children.
Not only am I doing this for myself, first and foremost, I am doing this for my family. I am doing this for my children. I am doing this for my health, my happiness, my sanity.
It is possible to do what you think is Impossible. All that you have to do is KEEP ON TRUCKIN.
Get rid of the people who say negative things. Get rid of the people who don't support you and put you down. You don't need them in your life.
Get rid of the self hate and the down talk and put all that completely out of your mind.
You are SO much stronger than you know, and all you have to do is water that potential and it will grow grow grow.
If I can do it, and am still doing it, I KNOW you can too.
Stay Happy, Stay Healthy My Friends!!!
<3 Shanbug
Pss... If you are looking for an amazing Trainer, Kenny Akers is the Best. HE does Personal Training, Bootcamps, and he also does Online Training- so even if you are in a completely different country, he can still train you.
If you end up signing up with him, let him know I sent you- He'll give you the royal treatment ;)
